Troubled Relationship? Divorce or Counseling?

I told you last year that I would tell you more about my dishwasher fixing story which relates to assessing the decision to stay together or get a porce.

We bought a dishwasher eight years ago and it was fabulous. It would clean well and you could put the dishes in without washing them.

Recently it stopped cleaning. My husband, Carl, was ready to buy a new one.  I was convinced it was a fixable problem. Not willing to wait for my husband to look at it, I went to my "fix it" resource, YouTube.com, and researched the matter. I persevered and ultimately I diagnosed a blocked chopper and I cleaned it. Good as new.

It worked for about three months and then the same for a problem arose. I started looking at new dishwashers. Features we had on ours were only available on very expensive dishwashers. I decided to fix it again. This time I replaced the chopper blade rather than just cleaning it . Success again.

The different approaches of my husband and myself remind me of the different approaches people take when faced with a troubled relationship, and they are thinking about divorce.

Some are willing to bolt of the first sign of trouble- (buy a new one); some just hang in there without attempting to change any of the dynamics- (resolving to hand wash dishes), and some put time and effort into fixing what they have the power to fix hoping that will be enough to turn things around.

Which kind of person are you? Awareness of your own approach to marital difficulties as well as observing your partner's approach to trouble in the marriage can be a starting point in shifting your perspective or resolving to investigate solutions. This becomes part of your decision-making process. Unfortunately, the kind of person that you are doesn't change whether or not the relationship is fixable if it is broken beyond repair.  You can work at it for years and never get anywhere.

A few takeaways.

1.  Moderation in all things.

2.  If everyone says there is a problem including your divorce attorney there probably is.

For Smart Divorce in Texas

Diane M. Wanger
304 Harwood Road
Bedford, Texas
817-285-2855
familylawtex.com